When it comes to gender roles, I am a 80’s woman…” I can bring home the bacon and fry it up in the pan!” Women can perform many jobs that have been traditionally held by men, in some instances better. Growing in an African-American household, we shared household responsibilities believing that there is value in having a man or woman who could do it all as being golden. My mother (of 10 children) taught us that independence meant being able to do it all; cook, clean, earn a respectable living and raise children…if need be alone as a single, not as a dependent. Having no gender roles is too absolute. I believe that society needs gender identity, but people are being forced into opposite gender roles. Women having to be mother and father is a long existing dilemma many find themselves in. I think women appreciate a masculine man and vice versa, men appreciate a feminine woman. In counseling, I find many couples struggle in the area of gender role expectations, fighting over “women should clean up the house or cook the meals.” True partnership in marriages allow individuals to fulfill the needs of the relationship and duties without expectations and conflict. Bottom line is to be you! Everyone is uniquely created, diminished gender roles are likely the future, but the greater concern is how will this paradigm shift affect the future.